The Scottish Past
by Supergeek-110
Summary: The story of Duncan's first days on the Skarloey railway. Duncan has serious difficulties getting used to and fitting in on his new railway, and pain from his past haunts him. (Events mentioned differ from their canonical appearance. Rated T for coarse language and mentions of abuse)
1. Prolouge: The Ship

Duncan sat nervously at the docks, the sound of workmen shouting orders and bustling about filling the air along with the screech of seagulls. He remembered the banner fluttering above the main doors to the factory he'd worked at for all these years. The banner reading that it had gone out of business and would be selling its location to a new buyer. It had seemed so…so strange to him. On the one hand, it had been such a relief to see that banner. The years of shouting, and lectures, and scratches was finally over. Just like that. No complicated escape or valiant rescue, just a simple banner freeing him after years and years of torment. But that banner had brought so much dread with it as well. The factory going out of business meant that he and all the other engines who'd worked there were to be sold off to new railways with new jobs open for them, and Duncan had never been one to handle change well in the slightest.

What was even more frightening for Duncan was just how new this new railway would be for him. Not only was this railway going to be full of engines he'd never met before, but the railway wasn't in Scotland as he'd expected it to be. The railway was instead on Sodor, a small island off the coast of England. Duncan had scarcely even heard of the island before, nor was he ready to drop everything and start working there. Before he could protest though, his ship had arrived and he was quickly loaded aboard and chained to the deck, the ship blasting it's horn as it set off for Sodor. It was to be a long journey and Duncan couldn't expect anything of what was to happen next. All he really hoped right now was that no one on his new railway would notice all of his scratches. Most of the dents he had received at the factory had been banged out already, and the scratches had been concealed as best as they could be, but Duncan had one especially large one on the side of his smokebox a worker had left on him that refused to be concealed. The scratches always made Duncan self-conscious, and he felt ugly every time he saw them or someone else pointed them out. The more he fretted about it, the more aware he became of his scratches. He tried to push it down where he couldn't feel it and tried to distract himself.

He didn't want to go to Sodor, but Duncan couldn't wait to get away from Scotland.


	2. Chapter One: The Railway

Duncan hadn't muttered a word since being loaded on the ship. He had simply sat completely still, almost expressionless. He should have been happy, but he hadn't smiled once. The sounds of gentle waves lapping against the boat was all Duncan heard, not hearing the words of workmen or cries of gulls; they all sounded quiet and distant to him. He kept his gaze locked on the deck in front of him, only occasionally glancing up at a passing worker. A few of them even commented on how quiet and emotionless the little engine had been for the entire trip, and how strange it was. Duncan didn't respond.

It was cold when the ship arrived at the docks, and a gentle drizzle fell from the clouds, sliding down the wooden dock and dripping into the sea. The shouts of dockyard workers sounded, and Duncan was soon unchained and off the boat. The dockyard manager was the first to speak to Duncan directly.

"Nice to meet you, Duncan. Welcome to Sodor." He said. Duncan mumbled something so incoherent that it hardly qualified as a response. "You're headed off to the Skarloey line, just back that way." The dockyard manager explained, turning and pointing behind him. "Mr. Percival will be waiting for you there; you can't miss him."

Duncan grunted a response, and steam billowed from his cylinders as he started off. He was observant to every detail around him, taking in the atmosphere around him to get his bearings. The bustling energy and strong salt odor of the docks quickly shifted into calmer open spaces and cool fresh air. It was actually very relaxing, Duncan had to admit, and soothed some of his anxieties about how this day would go. He soon reached a station, where a tall, thin man in a suit was waiting for him.

_Well, that ought to be him I suppose_, Duncan thought to himself, as he slowly glided to a stop. The tall thin man, who Duncan now knew as Mr. Percival pushed his glasses up his face and nodded.

"Ah, yes, you must be Duncan, am I correct?" Mr. Percival asked.

"Yes, Sir." Duncan answered, barely looking him in the eyes. "That's me."

"Right then. You've come to help sort out some difficulties and lighten the workload some. It's been a bit hectic around here, as one of our engines has recently been in an accident. Thankfully he's fine, but we need another engine like you to get things back on track and keep them there." Mr. Percival explained, pacing back in forth a little as he spoke. "Now, I suppose we'd best set you up with a driver then." Duncan was a little alarmed. His wheels shook a little.

"A-A driver, Sir…?" Duncan stuttered, his voice quavering a little.

"Well, of course," Mr. Percival responded, turning back to look at Duncan. He himself looked alarmed at how pale Duncan appeared. "What's the matter? You look as if you've seen a ghost!"

"I-I…" Duncan felt great shame wash over him, and tried to find a way to explain himself. "…have never been driven by a driver before," He finished, feeling pathetic as he said it. He looked up at Mr. Percival, expecting him to be angry, but he instead just appeared very surprised and equally confused

"You've never been driven by a driver before…" Mr. Percival repeated, seemingly trying to figure this all out in his head. "That's…odd, to say the very least. They didn't mention that in your paperwork. Well, then again, they didn't really mention _anything _in your paperwork."

Duncan wasn't surprised, his old railway had never really bothered to fill out any of their paperwork. Not to mention, as he and the other engines there had been bought quick and cheap, most of them didn't even retain their original paperwork.

Mr. Percival continued, "I suppose the first thing on our itinerary is to get you your driver and teach you how to be driven by one, then. Right, go introduce yourself to the others Duncan. I'll tell you when I'm ready for you."

Duncan nodded, "Yes, Sir. Thank you, Sir."

And so, Duncan headed off to meet the new engines on his railway. This was arguably the part of his new railway he was looking forward to the least. Being completely relocated in a new country on a new railway was a concerning enough aspect for him, but Duncan knew meeting these new engines was going to be a nightmare. He'd learned long ago never to get attached to someone, as being close to someone only made it hurt that much more when they suffered. And besides, what if these new engines were judgmental? Their glares echoing into his core as they made tiny mental notes about everything they saw when they looked at him. He feared they'd see the scar on his smokebox, and whisper about it amongst themselves, wondering what he could've done that was bad enough to deserve such treatment. Just thinking about it made the water in Duncan's boiler run cold, and he gulped, trying to ignore his thoughts as they spiraled darker and darker.

Just then, as Duncan had just begun to ignore himself, he looked up and felt like stone on the spot. Rolling down another line, not far away, was one of the new engines on his railway, and he was a diesel. Duncan was immedietly gripped with distrust and paranoia, and knew he couldn't let this diesel see him. Diesels like this new engine had been a big problem for steam engines like him back in Scotland. With so many diesels being introduced at once, and the luxurious promise that they were the stepping stones into the future, every railway desperately wanted one, and quickly lost interest in steam engines. That was how Duncan had gotten his job at the factory in the first place. He was intended to be a goods engine on another railway, but his slot had instead been filled with a diesel. Having no use for steam engines anymore, railways were simply selling them off for ridiculously cheap, and the factory had jumped at this deal, and bought a large number of them, including Duncan. Seeing that this new engine himself was a diesel engine resurfaced a lot of feelings that Duncan had long since tried to forget about and pushed deep inside of him, and he shuddered uncomfortably, trying to swallow down his own emotions.

It was at this point the diesel engine, who happened to be Rusty, had noticed the newcomer. Rusty was genuinely rather concerned to see that the newcomer looked, not excited as Rusty had expected, but uncomfortable and sickly looking, like he was about to throw up. Rusty, although a little worried, smiled at the engine, giving him a warm greeting.

"Oh, hello! I'm Rusty! You must be the new engine! Nice to meet you!" Rusty smiled. The new engine almost jumped at Rusty's words. The new engine then seemed to glare at him, and sped off without a word. Rusty was taken very aback, and almost offended, but tried to explain it rationally. "I'm sure he didn't glare at me; I probably just startled him. And he surely didn't respond because he's probably just shy." Rusty reasoned. Rusty smiled and nodded, "That must've been why he looked so pale and sickly too, he's just nervous." Satisfied with his explanation, Rusty kept rumbling along the line, trying to brush off this odd encounter with the newcomer. But, in the back of his mind, he was still a little worried. He'd never seen someone react so violently to something so small, and it honestly made him wonder if it was just being nervous that had caused it. Rusty sighed and tried not to think about it. Right now he'd just try to be nice to the new engine, and figure out anything he still had questions about later.


	3. Chapter Two: The Engines

It had reached a drizzly, cloudy mid-morning by the time Duncan reached the sheds to introduce himself to the others. He wasn't looking forwards to this 'meet-and-greet' but knew he'd have to introduce himself eventually and it'd be a lot easier to get it all done in one go than to go through the draining effort of introducing himself individually to each engine separately. There were 6 engines lined up in the sheds chatting amongst themselves quietly. Duncan took a deep breath and slowly pulled up, waiting for any of them to notice him.

Rusty recognized the yellow engine as he pulled up to the sheds, though this new engine certainly didn't act like he'd seen Rusty earlier; refusing to shoot even a glance at the little diesel. The chatter of the sheds puttered down and faded to silence as everyone noticed the new arrival. They all shot a glance at one another before looking at Skarloey. Skarloey cleared his throat and tried to smile at the engine, though the newcomer seemed more like he was scanning over everything rather than looking any of the other engines in the eyes.

"Welcome to our railway, care to introduce yourself?"

Duncan swallowed. He was already feeling quite uneasy, and only felt more out of place as he saw everyone staring at him. He forced himself not to allow the heat flushing over him to rush to his cheeks, and looked up at Skarloey, shifting uncomfortably.

"Duncan," He mumbled. "I'm Duncan."

Skarloey nodded a little; seemingly pleased with the fact the little engine had answered him at all.

"Well, it's very nice to meet you Duncan. This is my brother Rheneas," Skarloey said. The other, slightly younger, red engine beside Skarloey nodded as his name was said.

"This is Duke," A tan engine, seemingly as old as Skarloey himself, gave a stout, authoritative nod.

"Sir Handel," A blue engine, much younger than the three prior engines, being about the same age as Duncan himself, shot Duncan a glance. He quickly looked Duncan up and down. He didn't smile. Something about him set Duncan off and Duncan was already feeling a great deal of suspicion towards him. Skarloey didn't notice any of this.

"Here's Peter Sam," A green engine, next to, and a little younger, than the blue one, gave Duncan a friendly a cheery smile. Duncan didn't smile back. This engine was far more cheerful than any engines Duncan had seen before him. Or at least, the ones Duncan had known who _were _that cheery didn't stay that way very long.

"And lastly is Rusty." Skarloey finished. Duncan recognized the orange diesel from before. Rusty gave a gentle smile, but almost looked a little uncomfortable himself. Duncan didn't trust him in the slightest-he _was _a diesel after all-but something about the engine interested Duncan and he secretly wanted to know more.

"So, Duncan, how about you tell us about yourself?" Skarloey said. Duncan cringed and shifted nervously. _Oh, please not small talk,_ there was nothing he wanted to tell these engines about himself and nothing they'd actually want to hear. Duncan swallowed.

"W-Well…I worked at a factory in Scotland. They shipped out parts for all sorts of things," Duncan mumbled. His words were quiet and the others could hardly understand him. "It got closed to do bankruptcy and some…" Duncan looked at Rusty. "…Other things."

Skarloey nodded and Duncan continued, still barely above mumbling.

"That's when I got told I'd be coming here to, help you with the workload or something…" Duncan muttered. He could scarcely remember what he _had _been sent to Sodor for, and his head was in a fog at this point.

Sir Handel glanced over at his younger brother; a strange look on his face.

"Why doesn't he speak up?" Sir Handel whispered. "I can barely understand a thing he's saying, he's talking too fast and quiet." Peter Sam Shrugged.

"I don't know, but he's just been mumbling the entire time." He whispered back. Sir Handel squinted at the new engine, still muttering out frenzied nothings.

"I don't even think he's looking at us when he does talk, he's just staring at the ground." Sir Handel whispered. "He seems…"

"Distracted?

"I was gonna say out of it, but yeah. It's like he's in his own head rather than here. It's really weird. Like he doesn't even know what he's saying and it's just pouring out of his mouth, it's kind of starting to freak me out."

"Maybe he's just shy or something?" Peter Sam guessed.

"I'm not sure. He's stranger than that. He seems distracted and alert at the same time. He's giving me bad vibes, I'm not sure if I really like him."

Peter Sam hissed through his teeth a little and swayed a in thought.

"I'm not sure how I feel about him." Peter Sam whispered. "I mean, he seems really odd, and detached, but he's…I don't know…vague? It's like he knows and sees way more than he's letting on. He's just blurting out short replies as if he's desperate to retreat back to something. Away from us."

Sir Handel thought for a moment. "Maybe but I don't think I trust him. He seems shady and dodgy, like he's trying to get away with something. I think he's trying to hide himself so no one knows who he is or what his intention are. I wouldn't trust him if I were you."

Peter Sam thought for a moment, but didn't reply.

Duncan was still muttering quickly as he could, and his words were blending together as he grew a little pale. His eyes were still deadest on the ground and darting around rapidly. Duke was the first to speak up to him.

"Look sharp, chap, I can't understand a word you say when you stare at the dirt and mumble to yourself." Duke said. Duncan's eyes quickly shot up, almost a glance, but this time, he didn't look back at the ground. He felt his coupling chain gently bump against his buffer-beam and realized he'd been unconsciously swaying as he'd spoke. His face heated up instantly and he was horrified to realize that he must be blushing furiously. Duncan swallowed furiously.

"I-I-I'm sorry I-I—" Duncan was about to fall into yet another quick incomprehensible muttering fit when a man called his name.

"Oi! Duncan! Your driver's all set up and ready for you!"

Duncan fought off the urge to let out a sigh of relief and hurried off without saying goodbye.


	4. Chapter 3: Driver

It was still drizzling when Duncan went to go meet his driver, and he blinked to keep the rainwater out of his eyes as he pulled up to a station platform. Sitting on a bench, under the canopy of the frame around it, sat a young man. He was in a neatly pressed, seemingly new suit, and had a hopeful expression on his face. He turned to look as he heard Duncan pull in and grinned before springing to his feet like an overeager jackrabbit.  
"Ah! You must be Duncan! Everyone's been telling me about you! Nice to meet you, Duncan, I'm Dane and I'll be your driver!" The man said, pointing a thumb at his chest. Duncan was a bit taken aback by how…_excited_ the man seemed. Duncan certainly didn't get excited when something new happened, more annoyed and inconvenienced. So, to see this man so excited over something Duncan himself was dreading was a very odd thing to witness indeed. Though, whatever disgust and confusion Duncan showed in his face seemed to go unnoticed by Dane. Dane simply smiled down at Duncan and seemed to wait for a reply. Duncan gave a small sigh and closed his eyes to hide an eye roll.  
"Hi," He said in a monotonal voice. "Nice to meet you…_Dane._"

Dane grinned back, pleased with the little engine's response. "Oh! Your accent; I didn't realize you were a Scot!"  
Duncan had to fight off an unexpected cringe at Dane's attempt at small talk. "_Yep._" Duncan muttered back, wishing Dane would get on with this already.

"Well anyways, Duncan, I heard that you haven't been driven by a driver before," Dane said. Duncan was quite startled by this, and his brakes nearly slipped off in surprise. He didn't think Mr. Percival needed to be telling this lad anything about who had and hadn't driven him before, as frankly, it wasn't any of his business! Besides, Duncan didn't know a thing about him until now, so why should Dane know a thing about him? "Well, I have never driven an engine before, so I guess we're both beginners!" Dane said, pulling a goofy cheerful grin. Duncan was not amused by this attempt at comradery, and rather than chuckle at Dane's remark, Duncan opted to roll his eyes instead.

"Uh-huh," Duncan muttered, genuinely wishing to be _anywhere _but here.

"Well, I think I've wasted enough time rambling as it is, let's get to figuring this out. Time for you to be driven by a driver, Duncan!" Dane said with a smile. Duncan sighed and gave a slight groan.

"Joy…" Duncan growled as Dane clambered into his cab.

Further back along the line, Rheneas was sorting out some trucks when he heard someone else enter the yard and a whistle blow.

"Hey, Rheneas!" Sir Handel's voice called. Rheneas looked up at the little blue engine.

"Yea?" Rheneas asked, pausing after sliding the last of his trucks into a neat row. "What is it?"

"Have you seen that new engine we met at the sheds earlier? Where'd he run off to?" Sir Handel asked. "I think his name was Duncan or something, wasn't it?"

"It was Duncan. And he's off being taught how to be driven by a driver," Rheneas answered. Sir Handel pulled a puzzled face.

"He hasn't even been taught how to be driven by a driver?" Sir Handel asked.

"Nope."

"But I thought all engines were taught that pretty early on."

"That's what I said. But, not Duncan. He's been driving himself since his first day on Earth." Rheneas explained.

"Why?"

"No clue."

Sir Handel shook his head confusedly. "That new engine's weird…" He mumbled. "Anyways, isn't Duncan's driver a newbie?" Sir Handel asked, recalling meeting the driver in question and seeing how inexperienced he seemed.

"I think so,"

"That's gonna be interesting." Sir Handel snorted. "Figures, leave the doolally engine with the inexperienced driver. Cause that's gonna go so well."  
Rheneas frowned slightly, "I don't think it's fair to call Duncan crazy. We've only just met him."  
"Are you kidding me? We've known him for less than an hour and he introduced himself by mumbling and muttering at the speed of sound while looking everywhere but in our eyes. Lad's already acting barmy and we've hardly even met him."

"Well, I've just finished up my work here, and you don't seem to be busy, so if you want, we could go see how he and his driver are getting along."  
"Yea," Said Sir Handel. "This ought to be good…"

Duncan wasn't happy at all as he felt his controls be fiddled with and switched. Duncan had operated on his own for years and years and having someone standing around in his cab, grabbing ahold of his controls was such a foreign feeling that it was very uncomfortable and irritating to him. Even worse, Dane wasn't lying when he said he was new to driving engines. Duncan hadn't even been driven before but even _he _could tell that Dane wasn't 100% sure of what he was doing. He may have shown confidence before, but Dane made up for that with inexperience. Duncan could hear him mumbling to himself from his cab, about which lever did what and reminding himself what each gauge should read. The poor lad had even come up with several acronyms to remember things by, as eye-roll inducing as that was for Duncan. He couldn't help but think that neither of them would have to worry about this if he'd just be allowed to go off without a driver like he had on his old railway.

Duncan flinched and jerked to the side a bit as he felt a hand pat his cab door.  
"I think I'm getting the hang of this!" Dane's voice came excitedly from Duncan's cab. Duncan's face scrunched up and his eyes shut as he took a deep breath. Why was it so difficult for people to not take him by surprise? Or touch him without his permission for that matter. Duncan muttered indignantly to himself.

"_And I think _I'm_ getting annoyed with you._" Duncan hissed under his breath.

"What was that? D'you say something, Duncan?" Dane asked. Duncan felt him lean out of his cab a little bit.

"Nothing. Just humming." Duncan said. Though he was genuinely growing quite frustrated with the whole ordeal. It was bad enough to be on a new railway, but having to have a driver was a whole new hell he wasn't pleased to be putting up with. Duncan began to bucket a bit, just to be spiteful, and he felt Dane stumble a bit in his cab.  
"Woah! Easy there, boy! Rusty must've missed a spot when he fixed up these rails, we must've hit a rough spot."

_Rough spot, indeed._ Duncan thought to himself as he continued to bucket and bounce indignantly. He thought of how annoying this new railway was and everything else going on. From his embarrassing interaction with his fellow engines to having to have an overeager inexperienced driver, he was growing quite angry with his current situation. The more frustrated Duncan became, the more he bounced and rocked.

Meanwhile, watching from afar, Sir Handel and Rheneas had been observing how Duncan was doing, and weren't very impressed.

"Good Lord, the way he's jerking about you'd think he's got a bolt loose." Sir Handel muttered. "Look at 'im, bumpin' about like no one's business. Who's he think he is?"

Rheneas shook a little, "I don't know, but he's _definitely _never had a driver before and it really shows."

It was at this point they watched in surprise as Duncan bucketed forwards with a jerk and Dane stumbled from his footplate. Sir Handel looked confused.

"Bloody 'ell, what is he doing?" Sir Handel mumbled, glancing back at Rheneas.

"Does he not realize?" Rheneas muttered, glancing back at Sir Handel in equal confusion.

"Ay, bruv!" Sir Handel shouted. "What the fuck do you think you're doing?"

Without receiving a reply, they both watched in surprised horror and realization as Duncan raced away, Dane running after him.

"Di-Did he _seriously _just—" Rheneas stammered, almost at a loss for words.

"Did he just fucking _dump and ditch?!_" Sir Handel cried. "Oh, what a jackass! I told you he was a basket case!" Sir Handel huffed to Rheneas before he hurried off to see the outcome of this. Rheneas quickly followed behind.

Both engines weren't too far behind and had caught sight of Duncan who was bucketing and swaying down the line.

"Oi!" Sir Handel shouted. "Any explanation for dumping your driver back there?" Duncan didn't seem to have heard him, and Sir Handel was about to shout to him again when Rheneas thought back to a conversation he'd had with Duke a while ago. During it they'd been discussing what to do when someone wouldn't listen, and Rheneas remembered Duke had said something about 'letting someone figure things out'.

"Let's go back." Rheneas said, slowing himself.

"Huh?" Sir Handel asked. "Go back?"

"He doesn't seem to be in any danger." Rheneas said. "If he gets himself into trouble, he'll have to figure his way out of it."

Sir Handel looked at Rheneas strangely for a moment, seemed to contemplate something, then sighed a little.

"Yeah," He said. "Let's go back. _He'll _have fun trying to find his way back to the sheds on his own." Sir Handel hissed, glowering back in Duncan's direction.

Duncan on the other hand, had been surprised when Dane had stumbled out of his cab, but his initial surprise had quickly worn off and he'd become quite deviously pleased with himself. He'd gotten exactly what he'd wanted to, to go off without a driver! He felt much better this way, being able to go off on his own rather than have some inexperienced lad manning his controls. Duncan grinned smugly and hummed to himself as he strolled along the line. He didn't need any silly driver to tell him what to do! He'd had plenty of people ordering him around in his life and didn't need to add one more to the mix, even if this one was pretty harmless compared to the rest.

_"__Stupid engine! I told you to get those trucks already! Get a move on you lazy arse, you've got work to do and we aren't going to wait all day for you!" A man shouted. Duncan shut his eyes as he saw the man throw something, which clanged against his boiler painfully, leaving a dent. A crowbar. It rattled to the floor as Duncan cringed and winced, but he quickly hurried along to get his trucks like he'd been told._

Duncan shuddered a little and tried to clear the memory out of his head, swaying up and down and side to side in an almost circular motion to ease his nerves. This 'rocking and rolling' seemed to soothe him and settle down his mind and so he kept doing it as he puffed along the line. Duncan was so distracted by his own thoughts and his fidgeting that he didn't realize he was coming up to a tunnel, and rocked himself up, his tall funnel hitting and knocking out the keystone. Duncan realized what had happened as it happened.  
"_Oh horrors,_" He gasped as the tunnel trembled and rumbled above him. Duncan shut his eyes as bricks and stone came raining down, collapsing and trapping Duncan in tight. Duncan's eyes shot open again and he had to force himself not to freak out as he also realized at that moment that he was apparently rather claustrophobic. Dane was horrified at the mess when he finally caught up with his engine.

"Oh no!" Dane cried. "Oh dear this isn't good at all,"

"Yeh _think?_" Duncan hissed unkindly. Dane frowned, seemingly a little hurt, before mumbling to himself again.

"Oh, Mr. Percival's gonna kill us," He groaned, putting his hands over his face. "What were you thinking, Duncan? You can't just go running off without me! You're lucky you didn't get far or you might have never been found! How'd you even manage to take a tunnel down?"

Duncan simmered, and spat out an answer without even thinking.

"Not my fault the stupid tunnel is so small! Tunnels should be tunnels, not rabbit-holes!" Duncan didn't even realize he was the one who'd said it for a split second, but it was too late to take it back now.

"The tunnel's big enough for all the other engines who pass through it! What were you doing?"

"Nothing!" Duncan said, his voice almost taking on a whine. He didn't want to admit that he'd been distracted and fidgeting and taken down the tunnel in the process.

"Well whatever you did, now we'll have to dig you out and send you in for repairs."

Dane groaned and pulled his gray hat off his head, revealing a mess of sandy blonde hair. He leaned against the part of the tunnel that remained standing, his face curled in frustration. Duncan started to feel remorse for leaving the poor man behind at the sight of this, having only seen Dane giving his goofy grin before this point. He felt even worse as he heard what Dane was muttering quietly.  
"My first day and I already messed up this bad…"

Duncan wanted to apologize but felt a tightness in his throat and forced himself to look away. He wasn't going to let himself get attached to anyone. Not after what had happened last time he had. Duncan scowled to himself and said nothing.


	5. Chapter 4: Outburst

Skarloey arrived before long, and the tunnel had been cleared enough that Duncan could be pulled out of the wreckage he'd left behind as a result of his rock-n'-rolling. Skarloey did not look pleased with Duncan and Duncan tried to avoid looking the old engine in the eye as he pulled him along. Duncan finally built up the courage to ask a question.

"Where are we going?"

There was silence for a while and Duncan worried he'd only angered Skarloey more than he already had. Then, there was a sigh, and Skarloey spoke.

"To the works to be mended. You'll speak with me later tonight."

Skarloey's voice was deeper and gruffer now than it had been that morning when he'd introduced himself and Duncan felt a sinking feeling in his boiler as he knew that Skarloey was more than cross with him for his tunnel incident. Now Duncan dreaded not only going to the works, but the discussion he'd have to have after he returned from the works that night. Duncan cringed and closed his eyes, wishing to be anywhere but here.

_"__Oh no…"_

_"__What'd he do this time?" _

_The whispers echoed around the factory as Duncan puffed by slowly. His face was pale and his wheels shook as he approached the manager. The manager stood there in his enormous leather boots; his large sooty arms crossed angrily. Duncan felt himself beginning to tremble but tried to keep it hidden as he swallowed hard._

_"__Duncan," The manager snapped in a loud, harsh voice, causing Duncan to flinch. "Tell me-and everyone else here-what you did!"_

_The other engines looked on at Duncan sympathetically but said nothing, not wanting to be sitting up next to him themselves. Duncan swallowed again and forced himself to answer despite the horrible shakiness of his voice._

_"__I d-damaged some trucks…" Duncan mumbled in a meek voice._

_"__You RUINED some trucks!" The manager snapped in reply, making Duncan cower. "Their buffers are bent and now we'll have to fix them! Do you even realize how much that'll cost us to repair?" The Manager's tone was loud and shameful and he shot an accusing finger down at Duncan as he shouted. Duncan sucked in a breath and realized he hadn't been breathing._

_"__N-No, Sir, I don't, b-but it's probably a lot," Duncan squeaked, shrinking back as much as he could._

_"__It is a lot and now you've just forced us to pay it because you were being careless and ruined things like you always do and-LOOK AT ME WHEN I'M SPEAKING TO YOU, YEH WEE MANGLED FUD!" The manager roared and Duncan gave a startled whimper and looked up at once. He'd noticed Duncan averting his eyes to the floor and wasn't pleased about it. Duncan cursed himself, he knew better than to get the manager angrier than he already was. The manager was cursing Duncan under his breath as he turned to grab something. He picked up a chain and tossed it to another worker who caught it at once. Duncan felt the color drain from his face as he realized what that meant._

_"__Outside!" The manager bellowed, and Duncan skidded outside as fast as his wheels could carry him into the pouring rain. This would be bad enough as it was but this punishment was far from over as the worker with the chain came out and chained his wheels down to the rails. "Two days out there, Duncan! That'll teach you not to be careless with me trucks yeh wee bastard!" Duncan coughed as he unintentionally breathed in rainwater.  
"I'll do better next time…I'll do better, I promise…" Duncan whimpered._

Duncan groaned a little wishing the memory would go away. Once a careless good-for-nothing, always a careless good-for-nothing, he supposed. His manager had been right after all, he'd always been right. Duncan did ruin everything he did, so why did he expect his first day on this railway to go any differently. Duncan gave a heavy sigh and closed his eyes, wishing this day had gone better. They'd reached the works by then and Skarloey dropped him off with one final look that said 'we _will _talk about this later' causing Duncan to dread that night even more, he'd really messed up this time, hadn't he?

Getting repairs at the Steamworks turned out to be about as miserable as Duncan had worried that they'd be. He didn't even know why he needed to get repairs in the first place, he could still function and do his job so why was he even here? The factory wouldn't have let him get fixed up over something as simple as dents and scratches, and even when they would repair him, it'd usually include an hour long scolding for letting himself break down or get damaged severely, but so far the workers hadn't said much to him and had mainly just chattered with one another. Duncan shook his head, what was _wrong _with this railway and why didn't they do things the way the factory had?

Duncan leaned back a bit as a workman came worryingly close to Duncan's smokebox and worryingly close to a scratch Duncan _hadn't _sustained from the tunnel collapse. Thankfully the workman seemed far more distracted with the dents and scratches in Duncan's boiler to worry about his smokebox. Duncan flinched back once more as a workman raised a wrench, certain that'd he'd hit him with it and shout about how stupid he had been and how he was going to cost him a fortune, but this didn't happen either. Duncan sat on the hoist, wondering why no one was shouting at him or hitting him with a wrench to punish him or anything like that, he'd been careless and cost them money, so he should be punished, shouldn't he?

Duncan hardly had time to ponder this before a workman ducked below him and tightened a bolt on Duncan's undercarriage and Duncan winced louder than he'd meant to. He'd never admit it himself, but he was actually rather sensitive, and having all these workman adjust bolts and tighten and loosen things was only making it worse.

"Ow! That's as tight as it'll go!" He whined. "Watch what yeh're doin'!"

The workman Duncan was whining to gave a slight sigh, "Duncan are you going to whine and complain every time we do something to you? We're only trying to help."

"I don't _like_ bein' touched," Duncan hissed. "_And helpin' my arse._" He growled under his breath, angry at the workman for touching him without his permission and looking at his scratches when they were none of their business.

"Well I'm sorry about that, but we're going to have to touch you in order to help you get fixed up."

"I don't need any help!" Duncan spat. "I don't need you lot tryin' teh repair me, so why am I even here?"

"Duncan you had a tunnel collapse on you! What do you mean you don't need repairs?"

"So what? It's just dents and scratches! It's silly! I can still run and I can still pull coaches and cars so why fix me when there's nothin' teh be fixed?"

"Well contrary to what you think, Duncan, Mr. Percival likes dented and scratched engines to be fixed rather than looking like they've just been dragged through gravel." The workman said as he turned to get back to work. Duncan scowled and stuck his tongue out when no one was looking.

Duncan continued to complain for the rest of his repair and after a final safety check, he was cleared to leave.

Duncan returned to the sheds with a scowl on his face and dread in his boiler. He'd already not liked talking to the other engines just to introduce himself, but being told off by them on his first day was a brand-new hell he had to suffer through. The other engines looked very displeased. Some refused to even look Duncan in the eye and the others sent him disapproving glares. Duncan tried to ignore them as he creeped into a shed. After a heavy sigh Skarloey was the first to break the uncomfortable silence.

"I think you know that no one here is happy with your behavior today." Skarloey said. "What you did was reckless, irresponsible, and unkind and we don't stand for that kind of behavior here on this railway."

"I know." Duncan mumbled, barely audible. He wasn't looking at Skarloey as he said it though. Duncan was beginning to think of how terribly unfair this whole situation was.

"Leaving your driver behind was outright dangerous and incredibly hurtful to Dane. For you to just ditch your driver and rush off is rude and unacceptable."

Duncan grew frustrated, and spoke without thinking, "But I don't need a driver!"

"Don't be preposterous, it's dangerous to go without one and Dane is a very kind man who you _should _have had no quarrels with."  
Duncan glowered, "Unlike you lot, I'm not _dependent_ on drivers to order me around and tell me what to do! I've been ordered around plenty and I don't need even more people doing it. I can drive on my own so there's no point in me having a driver."

"We're not dependent!" Rheneas cried. "It's not safe to go off without a driver, who'll call for help if you derail and no one's around to help you? You're lucky Dane caught up with you once you hit the tunnel or who knows how long you would've been there!" Duncan glared back at him. Duncan opened his mouth to argue more but Skarloey jutted in before he got the chance.

"And worse off than leaving your driver behind, you brought one of our tunnels crashing down, lord knows how you managed that."

"The tunnel wasn't my fault!" Duncan snapped back at once. "Maybe you shouldn't build your tunnels so short that when some engine who isn't a short little saddle tank goes through it doesn't come crashing in on itself!" Duncan said, despite the fact that Rheneas was also not a saddle tank engine.

"Don't be disrespectful!" Skarloey shot right back. "You brought a tunnel crashing down! You do not get to shift the blame onto us!"

"I didn't do ANYTHING! Your tunnel came crashing in when I went through it, I didn't _do _anything to make it crash in!"

"Liar!" Sir Handel piped up from the other end of the shed. "You were rocking and rolling and swaying along the line! As if someone had removed the bolts from your undercarriage and loosened all your springs! Me and Rheneas saw you doing it! We went after you, too!"

"We did," Rheneas added, albeit hesitantly. "You were swaying along and bouncing up and down. That's probably how you knocked the tunnel down in the first place. Tunnels don't come down when an engine just _passes through them_."

"Yea!" Sir Handel said. "You brought it down because you were rocking along thinking you were hot shit. It's a tunnel, not a dance floor, you fucking dolt!"

Duncan's face grew red and he clenched his teeth. "That's _not _why I was rocking!" He growled back. "Don't call me a dolt, you little Welsh prick!"

"Enough!" Skarloey snapped. "Both of you!"

Duncan and Sir Handel glared at one another and then scowled at Skarloey, but didn't say anything else.

"Sir Handel you stay out of this," Skarloey said. The blue engine obliged but still sent Duncan a nasty look. "Listen here, Duncan. I don't know or frankly care _what _you were doing that brought that tunnel in, but I know it was recklessness. I don't know how things went on your old railway, but here on this railway, you follow our rules, do as your told, and don't argue."

Duncan glared up at him but managed to hold his tongue.

"You can't keep this behavior going. I know the first day, especially on a new railway in a new country is hard, but you have to do as you are asked without objection or arguing. After all, what would this railway be if no one did as they were told?" Skarloey had asked the question rhetorically but Duncan snapped out an answer anyways.

"Closed. Like this one should be."

Skarloey was aghast and Rheneas looked horrified.

"Duncan!" Skarloey cried. Duncan didn't even allow him to begin telling him off again.

"You think I actually give a shit about this railway? Because I don't." Duncan spat. "This railway could close tomorrow and I'd say good riddance because I don't care!"

Duncan had never really had the opportunity to speak his mind fully back at the factory and it felt so satisfying to do so now. Even as he watched horror and anger seep into the other engine's faces, he knew he should stop but didn't want to. If he wanted to be plain-speaking, who was going to stop him?

"That's not very kind! You—" Rheneas didn't get much further than Duncan had let Skarloey get.

"I don't care about any of you lot either!" His glare set on Rusty like crosshairs on an unsuspecting animal. "Especially not _dirty _diesels like you," He hissed, words aflame with repressed bitterness and anger.

"Duncan!"

He couldn't tell who had cried his name that time. Rusty looked crushed and his eyes teared up a little. Duncan felt some regret towards saying it but didn't apologize or show any remorse he did feel.

Sir Handel, having seen the tears welling in Rusty's eyes, could take Duncan's attitude no longer, and stopped holding his tongue.  
"Fine then!" Sir Handel snapped. "If you hate this railway so fucking much, why don't you go crying and whining all the way back to precious little Scotland, your cab empty as you rock n' roll back crying that our railway is the worst? After all, we could _never _live up to your old railway, could we? I'm sure it was just _so _much better!"

Duncan felt his face grow hot and a pressure immedietly spike in his boiler. Before he even realized fully what he was saying, he was screaming back.

"I FUCKING _HATE _SCOTLAND!" Everyone jumped in surprise at the volume of Duncan's outburst. "I'll never go back there as long as I'm still alive! You could drag me through hell before you could DRAG ME BACK TO MY OLD RAILWAY!"

Peter Sam was quivering in his shed while simultaneously quickly mumbling something to Rusty, Skarloey and Rheneas said nothing, but watched in surprise. Sir Handel wasn't willing to budge yet though, and shouted back just as loud.

"THEN WHY DO YOU WHINE AND MOPE AND SCOWL ABOUT OUR FUCKING RAILWAY? HOW WE'RE JUST SO MISERABLE AND AWFUL!"

"YOU KEEP YOUR DISGUSTING LITTLE MOUTH FUCKING SHUT AND DON'T TALK TO ME ABOUT SHIT YOU COULDN'T EVEN BEGIN TO UNDERSTAND YOU FUCKING BASTARD!" Duncan screamed right back. Duncan was trembling with rage, feeling his piston rods quake as he attempted to somewhat conceal his heavy yet rapid breathing. His voice hurt from how loud he'd been shouting, but he could barely feel it over the heat in his face and the pressure growing tighter and more painful as he got more frustrated. Suddenly, a sharp blast came from his cab and Duncan gave a stifled yelp as pain flashed through him.

"God damn it!" Duncan cursed. "Go to hell and die there! All of you!" Duncan snapped without thinking at all, and he took off in a violent burst of speed and a cloud of steam.

Sir Handel was still glaring daggers at Duncan as he left.

"Fucking _psychopath,_" Sir Handel hissed. "Fucking Psychopath!"

Rusty was fighting off tears, still incredibly hurt by what Duncan had said. Meanwhile Peter Sam was mumbling kind words to him, and trying his best to soothe Rusty and make him feel better.

"I fucking told you!" Sir Handel cried to Rheneas. "I told you he was due for the nut-house and I was right! He's insane! Did you hear him screaming!?"

Rheneas himself wasn't actually paying much attention to the blue engine's rant and was looking down at the ground.

"That went…terribly." He mumbled to no one in particular.

"No kidding." Skarloey said. "I thought we'd just have a stern talk and the issue would be settled but I think things got worse off than they were before."

Rheneas, not knowing what else to say, attempted to divert the topic. "Was that his safety valve blowing off at the end there?"

"I don't know…" Skarloey mumbled, sounding tired enough for one day. "Probably."

"You sound tired," Rheneas comforted his brother, "You should get some rest. You've done enough for one day. It's my turn tomorrow."

Rheneas turned to the other engines in the sheds.

"We should _all _get some rest."

The other engines mumbled out half-hearted agreements, and pulled back into their sheds once more. Rheneas had more plans than just bedtime though. Despite how horrendously Duncan had behaved, Rheneas knew that the young engine couldn't get far with a burst safety valve and would need assistance getting to the works for repairs. Rheneas hadn't forgiven Duncan for his outburst or actions, but he didn't think the little engine deserved to be stranded alone in the cold all night either. He waited until the others' steam had died down and they'd dozed off quietly before setting off into the night.


	6. Chapter 5: At Twilight

Duncan was still speeding along in the dark but quickly losing steam thanks to his burst safety valve and was slowly but surely loosing speed. He hurried to get into a siding and roughly collided with the buffers at the end, not that he really noticed. Growling he slammed into it again, purposefully this time.

"Stupid fucking engines!" He snapped, tears suddenly springing to his eyes. He growled again, louder this time, trying to outweigh the sudden overwhelmingness he felt with anger. "Tell me what to fucking do and boss me around like everyone else does! Who are they to tell me how to act?!" Duncan was shaking with anger and clenching his teeth to the point they hurt. His eyes stung with welled up tears but he didn't want to let them fall and instead stared viciously at the ground.

"Go back to Scotland in-fucking-deed! Go back to the damn factory and get me arse beat for being a little shit! That'll make everyone happy won't it? T' see the fuck-up get the shite beat out of 'im? He'd deserve it, _wouldn't he!?_" Duncan practically screamed and the built-up tears slid down his face at once.

Duncan sucked in a shuddery gasp through clenched teeth and went to ram into the buffers again but found he was finally out of steam and couldn't move an inch. Cursing harshly, Duncan blinked up at the sky, trying to stop the tears falling from his eyes.  
"I hate this stupid railway. I thought things would go well here, but I should've known they wouldn't! Bastards the all of them! See if I care! I'd rather rot out on this siding than talk to the likes of them anymore." Duncan huffed angrily for a few moments but his breaths grew more and more shuddery.  
"Fuck they're really gonna beat me for that outburst aren't they…" Duncan winced. "I screamed at them and told them to go die, they'll have my buffers for that one. God, Manager was right, I really can't do anything without fucking it up. He's always right. If I just listened to him I wouldn't be such a letdown, he knows what's right and what's not and that's why he'd beat me bloody if I was doin' somethin' wrong. It's me own fault I got my metal caved in on itself, and when the others find me they'll cave it in again if they know what's good for em."  
Suddenly Duncan couldn't stop himself and let out a short, cut off shuddery sob as twin tears rolled down his face. He couldn't hold back for long though as he started whimpering loudly as tears streamed down his face.

"W-Why am I crying? I-I deserve anythin' coming t' me! I fucked up! So why am I crying?" Duncan gave a harsh shuddering gasp. "I-I knew I wouldn't manage a day on this railway without ruining everything, i-i-it's no surprise no one'll like me after this! I-I-I'm getting what I had c-coming so I shouldn't be upset by it! Th-They'll give me something to bloody cry about!" Duncan's sobs grew hysterical and he was giving choked breaths as he couldn't stop the tears from falling.

"I don't want them to hit me, I wanna do things over again, I don't wanna be a failure anymore," Duncan wailed. "I wanna do good, I wanna do such a good job that there's no need to hit me but I always fuck up again! I was a fuck up in Scotland, I was a fuck up in the factory, and I'm a fuck up here too! I'll never be anything more than that so I shouldn't be crying about it like a little _mairt!_"

_'Pathetic little cunt!' The manager swung the pipe again, it slammed into Duncan's side and he gave a stifled cry as the tears in his eyes spilt. 'Quit yer crying or I'll give you something t' bloody cry about you fucking disgrace!'_

Duncan sniveled hard and did his best to muffle and stifle his uncontrollable sobs as it felt as though his very heart was hurting.

The cool night air swirled around Rheneas as he swept through the night looking for the little yellow engine. He knew it was getting late but didn't want to abandon his search and leave the little engine out in the rain overnight. Gentle but cold raindrops speckled and slid down Rheneas' warm boiler as he looked out through his lamp.

"Duncan! Duncan? I know you're out here, just answer back! I need to find you so we can get you repaired and back to the sheds where you'll be out of the rain!"

But of course, no answer came, and after giving a slight sigh, Rheneas continued his search. Rheneas really didn't know what to think of Duncan. One minute he'd be avoiding everyone's gaze and mumbling too low for anyone to hear and the next he'd be screaming enough to make everyone wince and cringe. The little engine was like a bottle of violently shaken soda, looking innocent and quiet but the minute the cap was off it was just a huge explosion creating a whole mess alone. And when Sir Handel got involved? It was like kicking off an active volcano.

And that was just a few hours ago. Duncan had also kicked his own driver out of his cab and deserted him to give chase. What could possibly make the little scot so _angry _at everyone? Rheneas just couldn't understand it. Sure suddenly dropping everything and going from Scotland to some small island off the coast of England couldn't have been very fun, but this anger was like some deep rooted weed that had long since clutched itself in the dirt and was just now _finally_ being allowed to bloom. Today sure hadn't been a good day.

"_Duncan!_"

"Go _away!_"

Rheneas hadn't actually been anticipating a reply and flinched slightly at the harsh little engine's voice. It still sounded seething as he'd expected, but almost…warbly? Like he was speaking through a tremble. Rheneas felt the cold raindrops slide down his boiler. No wonder. It was freezing and wet out here.

"Tell me where you are, Duncan, I'm going to take you to be fixed up and then back to the sheds." Rheneas said. "Out here in the freezing rain is no place to sleep!"

Rheneas heard Duncan groan, "I don't _want _to go back to the Steamworks!" His voice had taken on a whine and the tremble grew worse. "I _hate _it there!"  
"Well you've got to have your safety valve repaired and besides, it'll be a good place to warm up. You'll catch a miserable cold if you stay out in this weather overnight."

Duncan grumbled but said nothing as Rheneas finally stumbled on him.

"Ah! That's where you were, come on then!"

Duncan wasn't pleased at the idea of going _back _to the Steamworks and being fiddled and tinkered with again but was even more horrified when Rheneas backed up and coupled up to him. He felt his breathing speed up and hoped Rheneas couldn't hear it.

"Wh-What are you doing?!" Duncan said, sounding more panicked than he'd meant.

"Well I've got to get you to the Steamworks somehow and you can't move on your own,"

"B-But—" Duncan didn't know what to say. How was he supposed to tell Rheneas he didn't like being touched and that right now it was literally the worst thing that could happen to him? He closed his eyes and attempted to steady his breathing to try and ease the overwhelming sense of panic and unease swept over him like dark water.

_He's going to hurt me. _Duncan thought. _That's why he's taking me to the Steamworks, they're going to give me a right beating for what I did, oh god he's gonna hurt me._

Duncan heaved in a few terrified, trembling, rapid gasps as he tried not to fall into a complete panic. He shut his eyes as tightly as he could and tried to imagine the rain washing all of his fear away. He just prayed that whatever happened at the Steamworks wouldn't be as bad as what would happen when he returned to the sheds with the other engines.


	7. Chapter 6: Goodnight

After a very awful, very panic filled, and-_thank the lord himself-short _trip to the Steamworks to get his safety valve repaired, Duncan sat staring out at the bleary blurry sky as cold rain drizzled down. As he watched the cold, covered night sky he pondered what on earth to do. He _absolutely _didn't want to stay here at the Steamworks for even a _second _longer but at the same time he really, really didn't want to go back to the sheds with the other engines who'd almost certainly not forgiven him for screaming at them earlier that evening. As he sat troubled with thoughts as to what he should do, Rheneas made him violently flinch by setting off his whistle shrilly, the noise slicing through the cold air like a blade.

"Come on, Duncan, it's getting very late and you and I both need rest for tomorrow," Rheneas said, steam gently hissing from his steam cylinders.

Duncan winced. "Are we going back to the sheds?"

"I don't know where else we'd go—"

"Can't I just sleep out on a siding-_please—_" Duncan groaned, genuinely not wanting to show up around the other engines _ever again. _

"In this weather?" Rheneas cried; astonished. "It's pouring bucketloads of freezing rain-you'll catch ill—"

"But I'm from Scotland! It's always icy rain there I'll be fine—"

"We've got a spare shed for you and that's where you get to sleep, we're not going to force an engine to sleep out in the freezing rain,"

Duncan groaned, "But I'm not _being forced _to sleep in the rain I just don't want to sleep in the sheds-!" He cut himself off before he could say anymore, but Rheneas seemed to understand regardless.

"I know you're probably worried about how everyone feels about your outburst but their probably all asleep by now and besides the best thing to do is to just leave it alone until everyone is calm enough-_and well rested enough-_to talk about it." Rheneas said. "And I'm not going to let you sleep in the rain so stop asking." He said teasingly. Duncan gave a half-hearted chuckle.

"Alright, fine, if you say so—" He mumbled and wearily trailed behind Rheneas.

The journey back was silent as Rheneas was too tired to say anything and Duncan felt too uncomfortable trying to speak friendly to an engine he'd screamed at only a while ago and himself was starting to get too tired to care about anything but falling asleep. The sheds were quiet when they arrived back and Duncan squinted into the darkness, but no eyes reflected back in the dim light of his rain-muffled lamp and he sighed with relief. All the engines seemed to be asleep which meant he wouldn't have to speak to any of them or feel their glaring eyes until morning. Rheneas crawled into his own shed with a yawn and as he hit the back buffers his lamp flicked off and he seemed to fall asleep almost instantly. Duncan still sat wearily outside the sheds. Sleeping in them seemed like a bad idea considering he'd wake up with nothing but a thin wooden wall and perhaps a door between him and the rest of the engines who were very but also rightfully angry with him. Duncan sighed and winced as every pain of the day seemed to flow through him at once and every part of him resounded with a dull ache.

He was too tired to think worried thoughts of what the others would do or say by the time morning came around and as his eyes went bleary and his brain clouded he slid into his own shed, the door partially open, allowing in the sounds and smells of the cold rain outside as Duncan huddled at the back of his shed. Duncan was pleasantly surprised. His sheds at the factory had been victim to wood rot and termites and always let water in when it rained and were bitterly cold in the winter. This shed was watertight, warm, and _comfortable. _Duncan could scarcely marvel at how cozy it was as his eyes began to slowly shut the minute he was snuggled up inside of it.

_Everyone's going to hate me when I wake up-_ Duncan thought he yawned and slowly let his eyes shut fully. _But this shed is so warm and nice-maybe things won't be so bad after all…_

And before Duncan could even realize, he'd fallen into a deeper sleep than he'd ever had on his old railway, the last of his worried thoughts melting away as he did.


End file.
